Be Still

I sit here, fingers on the keyboard, researching antioxidants, oral cancer and toothpaste.

 

She always has a tummy ache, maybe she needs to go gluten free like my mom.

 

I just heard the big one cough again, maybe she’s getting pneumonia again. We went a whole year without it, I was hoping for longer.

 

She’s going under anesthetic, my baby. Are we doing the right thing? Is this cough really that important.

 

Type type, research research, yet my mind gets noisy again.

 

Am I giving them enough attention? I’ve been working a lot, and they are fighting a lot, maybe I am not doing this right.

 

Man, that election was killer. Will my kids know the freedom of carrying a Bible if they want? Should we buy a gun while we still can?

 

Focus. Type. Research.

 

Did I make enough this month? Christmas is coming, and Florida. Will we be good, or should I work a little more tonight? What if the work stops flowing this month? Will I make enough to cover tuition?

 

What about Tim. He probably wanted the house cleaner when he got home. I am not doing a very good job at that. Maybe I should take the day off tomorrow.

 

Type, type, type, click, click, click,

 

 This is a new client. The instructions are vague. How do I know what he wants? What if I am wasting my time?

 

Suddenly, a still small voice, Be still and know that I am God.

 

I love them more than you ever could.

 

I know exactly where your next client and your next paycheck is coming from.

 

I see you are doing your best with your kids and your husband.

 

It’s just a house.

 

Relax. Trust. Pray. And love them with all you have.

 

But in the end, Be Still and Know that I am God.

 

My anxious mind calms, my focus returns, and I finish out the night.