About Me

I am a proud wife and mother, and a born again Christian. I work from home as a writer while taking care of Miss N, our six-year-old, Miss M, our four-year-old and Miss C, our newest bundle of joy. Life is crazy but so much fun!

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Are You an Emotional Mother?

I am not an emotional mother.

Sure, I cried when they drew blood from my two-year-old who was miserable sick.

Oh, and I cried both times my kids were born and I heard their cry and saw them for the first time.

And I got angry when Natalie told me kids at school called her weird.

But most of the time I am not an emotional mother. I love to hear “I love you” and get sweet hugs and kisses, but they don’t make my heart “jump” or put a tear in my eye. It doesn’t break my heart to hear my baby crying. It stirs me to action, sure, but I have not struggled with letting the baby cry if she needs it.

Is that bad? Is that something that I should try to change?

Or is it just who I am?

I read other mother’s blogs and talk to other mothers who are constantly tearing up and getting choked up about their kids. They are reminiscing about “when they were tiny” and morning the passing baby years. I am not like that. I rejoice in each new accomplishment and look forward to each upcoming stage. While I enjoy the toddler years, I am reveling in the conversations of the preschool years. I don’t look back on the toddler years sadly, but with a fondness and appreciation while enjoying what has come and looking forward to what is coming.

In thinking on this today I wonder if there is any biblical principle to consider. I know that the Bible states multiple times how a mother’s instinct is to care for her children. I care for my children. I meet their every need and most of their wants. I give them good things. Perhaps the principle is that I should not be comparing myself to others. Hmmm.

My mother is an emotional mother. I love her for it. My friend Janna writes as an emotional mother. I love her for it. I am not an emotional mother.

Is that so wrong?

These two little girls are loved beyond measure, and told so regularly, hugged on, and kissed on, but I am not emotional.

Am I a less adept mother?

Or just a little too logical?


Jan said...

As I read your post I teared up. LOL just shows how emotional or as Dad says 'sappy' I am. There are good and bad to both sides, the key is finding the right balance. I think you have done that. Your girls do not doubt if they are loved and you are touched when they say something sweet. (like N's gift of love to you in the van last week) Crying or grieving about things you can do nothing about really do not help anyone, trust me I know.

I love you sweetheart and am so glad you do not cry over coffee commercials ;-)

laugavitz said...

I think that you are beyond a wonderful Mother. Everyone is different and God made you who you are for a reason!

Adventure Mom Janna said...

You are fearfully and wonderfully made and you are more emotional than you realize in a good way.

Just because your emotion doesn't spill over in your eyes doesn't mean it isn't there in your heart.

I'm emotional? I don't mind being labeled that but I didn't even recognize it in myself. I don't cry but I write to show my emotion. Just how I'm made I think.

I hear emotion in your stories about your girls all the time like when cinderella gave N the cotton candy. I could tell that moment was sooo special to you.

What am I saying...you are the mom God wants you to be to the child God has given you. He matched you up perfectly so don't worry about being more of this or that unless it's God showing you you need to change.

Love you, (I'm starting to cry now) Not!

a joyful nusiance said...

Your still in the "baby-toddler" stages.

Give it a couple more years and you might "mourn" the precious years you are in now.

You might mourn when you know that God has shut your womb and your baby years are behind you.

I rejoice where my kids are now, I love to see them still growing.