If you are new to this discussion, please visit these posts: Healing After Emotional Abuse, Signs of Abuse, and The Pain of Words.
I haven't posted on emotional abuse in a while, well, because I have been caught up in caring for my growing/ill children, going on vacation, and such. I have been thinking on one thing about the topic though. Recently when talking to my friend, she said, "Yes xyz (a topic we were discussing) hurts, but I am moving forward."
Later I was thinking to myself, Well, it's good that she is ready to move on, then I realized that was not what she was saying. there is a huge difference between moving on and moving forward. She is still working towards reconciliation with her spouse, but she is not going to sit on her duff and do nothing while she waits for him to step up.
If you have been abused or know someone who has, there may not be a "moving on." The scars that were created, the hurt that occurred, and the void left in the life by the missing spouse may not be able to be healed or filled, outside of the love of Christ. In fact, the person may not want to move on. The person may wish to reconcile with the abuser if the abuser can change. Encouraging them to "move on" may not even be biblical advice, depending on the circumstances. There will always be repercussions from this event, and God has a reason for this. However, what you can do is encourage your friend (or yourself) to move forward. This is a positive action that will aid in healing.
Mercy: Help When We Are Weak
6 months ago